National Foster Care Month: Supporting Children, Families and Foster Parents

The Impact of Foster Parenting

One of the most rewarding parts of being a foster parent is knowing that you can have an impact on the life of a child or teen in a meaningful way. And by the same token, creating that strong bond of love with the child can be one of the more difficult challenges when it is time to let go.

Foster Care by the Numbers

According to the National PTA, there were nearly 400,000 youth in foster care in 2012, and about 250,000 were school-aged. During the first foster care stay, a youth experiences 2.8 living arrangements. Children in foster care are twice as likely to be absent from school, are more likely to have out-of-school suspensions, and only about 50% will complete high school by age 18. More than 50% of students in foster care experience a school change, and more than a third of 17-18-year olds will experience at least five school changes in their lifetime.

Challenges Children in Foster Care May Face

Other challenges include learning, reasoning, processing and behavior problems. Some medical conditions may include Attention Deficit Disorder, Fetal Alcohol Syndrome and Attachment Reaction problems. To be a foster parent is a big challenge, and truly it must be a gift of love.

Tips for Parenting Children in Foster Care

Here are some suggestions on parenting children in foster care:

Practice Patience and Stress Management

Learn techniques that help you be more patient, whether it be by exercising, taking a walk, soaking in a tub, meditating, working in the garden or listening to music. You can then draw from these activities when stress levels rise.

Create a Safe and Structured Environment

Provide the child with a safe and structured environment by making simple, specific and easy to understand rules.

Build an Environment of Trust

Create an environment of trustworthiness. Demonstrate trusting behavior at home. Ask friends and children to tell you how you come across to others.

Stay Connected and Take Care of Yourself

Take care of your own needs by remaining connected to family, friends, a club or a religious organization.

Understand Child Development

Learn about child development so that you know what to expect and anticipate when a child regresses in their behavior, especially after trauma or a transition. A good book on development is T. Barry Braselton’s Touchpoints.

Advocate for the Child

Find your inner courage so that you can advocate for the child when seeking special services and in talking with agencies. Along these lines, children need to see you operate with resiliency as you go through the ups and downs of parenting. This will model for them your commitment and love.

Maintain a Sense of Humor

Maintain a sense of humor as a necessary tool for survival. This will often give you the strength to face problems.